Sunday 24 June 2012

CD8, & The Baby Shower

I had my CD8 monitoring appointment today.  My follies seem to be doing great!  I have two good follies (1.8 & 1.6), and one more that might catch up (1.3).  Not bad for CD8!  :)  I will be taking Gonal-f again today, and then hopefully, triggering tomorrow!  IUIs on Tuesday and Wednesday.  I am so excited and nervous!  Excited because well, I always am - I am a perpetual optimist, and having two to three good follies just makes me that much more hopeful.  Nervous, because no matter how well my body responds and how many follies I have, none of that will matter if MH's numbers are too low.  Eek!  Please, please cross your fingers for us. 

I am happy that I had a good appointment today, as it might make this afternoon a bit more bearable.  I have to go to THE baby shower today.  "THE" because it is for the one person whose pregnancy makes me very sad - I found out that this woman was pregnant within an hour of starting to miscarry in January.  :(  She was just a little further along than I was at the time.  While I do okay with pregnant people and baby showers in general, her pregnancy is a different story.  It reminds me of what I (almost) had, and lost, and of how far along I would be right now (7 months!) had my body not failed me.  She is a great person, and I am honestly, truly very happy for her - but I can't help but be sad for me at the same time.  As I said, she is the only person whose pregnancy really draws out these emotions in me, and I feel terrible about it.  I'm sure it's because of how/when I found out. Thankfully, she has no idea, as I am very good at hiding my emotions and putting on a good face.  I'm sure that I will be able to do it again today.  It will be hard though. 

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