Saturday, 14 July 2012


I honestly didn't think that I would be this scared.  But, I can't get seem to get my prior loss out of my head now, and I can't stop worrying that the same thing is going to happen again.  See, I have had cramps on and off for a few days.  Nothing severe, but sometimes they are sharp.  I keep trying to tell myself that they are gas pains or something, because they have moved around a little and that seems odd to me.  Today I have consistent, sharp-ish pain on my lower right side.  As much as I really am trying not to worry, it's kind of freaking me out.  I know that cramps can be normal, and I know that they may not be a big deal, especially since I am not spotting.  That said, I just can't seem to stop over-analyzing this and worrying.  *sigh* 

My first beta on Thursday was 135 at 14 DPO.  I am just hoping and praying that my second beta on Monday is where it should be - which is at least around 540.  If so, then I think I will be able to relax a little bit.  Until then, I guess I will just try to keep my mind off of it.  There really is nothing that can be done to prevent a loss at this point anyway - if it going to happen, it is going to happen. 

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