Yup, Normal! And Baby Shoes. :)

So my OB called me at work yesterday.  She actually sounded pretty excited.  She said that she had just received my ultrasound report from Tuesday, and wanted me to know right away that my ultrasound was indeed 100% normal!  My placenta no longer looks abnormally thick, and there is no hematoma.  Samuel is measuring in the 68th percentile, and weighs approximately 800 grams (that's about 1.76 lbs).

For the first time in this entire pregnancy, there actually doesn't seem to be anything wrong or unusual.  I am normal. Sam is normal. :)

I am so freaking happy!!!

I am still spotting everyday, and that sucks.  Given our history, it is hard not to worry, at least a little bit.  My OB swears though that there is no explanation for the bleeding, so it must be my cervix.  I won't let her do a cervical exam to check (she doesn't recommend it anyway), so I will just have to take it on faith that she is right.  Some women do spot through their entire pregnancy - I guess I may be one of the few that do so.  Lucky me.

But, back to being super happy!!!  :)

Between this amazing news and reaching viability, I have garnered enough confidence to start doing some shopping.  My first purchase was an adorable pair of shoes.  Not practical, since he won't need shoes at that point, but they are just so tiny and precious, I couldn't resist:

 

I've also bought a few sleepers, and an adorable little pair of (equally impractical) jeans.

 

I am in the process of setting up a registry, which to be honest is much more overwhelming and difficult than I thought it would be.  There are so many options, and so many different opinions and reviews on what is necessary, what is a waste of money or space, what works, and even what is or is not safe.  I am getting through it slowly though, mostly to satisfy my mother in law. 

 

Oh, and don't even get me started on how challenging it was to choose the right stroller!  I *think* I've decided on the Uppababy Cruz.  Still mulling it around a bit before I make the purchase though.

 

To be clear, I am definitely not complaining!  I feel so, so blessed to still be carrying my little boy inside me right now.  I honestly didn't think that I would make it past the first trimester, let alone to viability, and an actual diagnosis of "normal."  When I think about it, I can't stop smiling. :)

 

 

 



Hoping for the Best

Well, the spotting stopped.  It really didn't last very long, just about two days.  It was also actually extremely light, notiwthstanding my initial melodramatic description of it as "bleeding."  It really started tapering off within hours of appearing.  The cramps are still coming and going, but I think they were there last week as well - I can't remember at this point.  They feel just like period cramps.  Anyway, I am trying not to assume the worst, but I am terrified.  I know that either spotting or cramps can be normal, but the two together are rarely a good sign.

I finally convinced my RE to move my viability ultrasound up by a week, to next Thursday, when I will be 7 weeks.  Hopefully, at that point I will see a strong heartbeat, and be told that everything is on track. 

In the interim, I went to the clinic that saw me through my last miscarriage, and had a beta drawn.  It was 12,600.  It had been 4,323 a little less than 5 days prior.  That gives me a doubling time of 75 to 77 hours, depending on how precise I am about what time the tests were taken (75 hours is precise).  I get that this is actually perfectly normal, given how high the betas are (1,200 - 6,000 should double every 72 to 96 hours, >6,000 can take >96 hours).  I still hate that it is not less than 48 hours though, even though I know that it is not expected to be at this point.

But yeah, the apparently normal doubling time is a good sign, and gives me some relief for sure!  With my last miscarriage, falling betas were my first real sign of trouble after spotting.

I'm not doing another beta, because I don't know what the upper limit of normal is at this HCG level, and I think I will probably just stress and worry if it is above 96 hours at all (as it apparently should be).

So now, all I can do is wait for that ultrasound, and hope, and pray. 

I have never prayed so hard for anything in my life.

I mean, everything could be okay.  I did start spotting brown a couple of days after an extremely invasive and uncomfortable internal ultrasound (seriously, she had it at like 90 degree angles at times).  That is normal, right?  And so are the cramps...right?  It could be okay.  Maybe, just maybe, I won't lose this baby too.